Profound

It's been 2 and a half years since I last blogged ( I hate sentences which say "2 and a half", either its two and a half or 2 and a 1/2, whats the deal with 2 and a half???) and there's no particular reason why.

I just saw the first 10 minutes of 7 pounds (Will Smith looking constipated) and I realized that I HATE movies which are setting me up for the ending...I feel wronged...why should I have to endure the whole movie to figure out whats going on....sigh...as I get older, I realize that my patience with most forms of entertainment is going down. I don't enjoy getting drunk like I used to, I dislike most movies and tv programs, even cricket is boring (once in a while) and I have to put in effort to enjoy stuff...it requires commitment.

Saw Dev D on Friday and I thought it was great...it helps if you are watching on the DVD because you can fast forward the bits which are boring (or sissy). My brother-in-law often says that people will come to watch a show/movie/anything if they see passion behind it (he should know). Seeing someone else live their passion is what gives us hope to endure our dreary life. And I saw passion in making Dev D, the sheer audacity in making a movie like this required passion.

Reading through my past posts, it appears that my blog started out with stuff about SRT and then wandered aimlessly to movie reviews and then finally Apoorv forcing me to admit that I was on Benadryl. That was the last straw.

I'll tell you what my current problem is. I've realized (and there's a difference between realizing and knowing) that I created the world, or rather, I create the world. Every moment, I create. And I'm so used to it that I don't know how to stop. I pity the world and I'm amazed by its stupidity but I can't stop, not because I don't want to, but because I don't know how. I know there's a "pull chain to stop train" thingamajig but don't know where it is. I've been asking someone I know to tell me where it is but I'm not ready, it seems.

I'd like to end with something funny, but can't think of anything...so just pretend I wrote something funny and you laughed and you think I'm a cool guy. Chill.

The One

Every thought that comes into my mind is determined by the 'mind made self', known in some circles as the 'Ego'.The usage of the term 'Ego' has come to mean many things in modern day life and i don't want those to cloud the understanding of what i am trying to convey here. So I'll stick to 'mind made self', henceforth known as 'mms'.

The mms is a pretty cool guy, a hep person, numero uno, the person you love (or in some cases, love to hate) the most. How do i know that mms is all this for you? I know he's all the things said above and more. How else do you explain the fact that EVERY second of your life, you behave like him? (Hey, just occurred to me, when i say him, i mean her too.) In fact i would go a step
further and say you and he are no longer best friends, but you are his SLAVE. There, I said it. Now you can be indignant, get angry or just laugh this off...but ..but remember its not you who is laughing or being indignant. Its him...mms. He doesn't even want you to know that he exists. From the time you were a child, he has been you. Your environment, family, friends,
social surroundings have helped him grow. You never even knew when he took over.

I'm talking garbage? Lets do an experiment.Look into the eyes of a 1 year old baby and eye of a 25 year old man/woman.
Can you not see the difference? The mms has no hold over the baby, but the woman? Hey! take your eyes off the woman now...experiment over.
You could say the comparison is not fair as there are too many differences between the two. However much you deny it, don't you see the wonder in the child's eyes? He has no mms telling him what he should feel, how he should react, what will happen when he tastes ice cream. mms wont allow you the luxury of having a genuine experience..In fact he wont even allow you to enjoy your meal. He'll tell you what it tastes like even before you take the first bite. What I'm trying to say is that mms has got your life planned out for you and his work is very subtle. The thoughts that come into your head, the reactions or responses you make to a comment by your wife, mom or tennis coach, they're all predetermined. The first and foremost step to meet your own mms is to be aware of the next thought which comes into your head.

Stop.

Watch your thoughts.

Its subtle,

But its watchable.

Do you see it? If you were able to see it, then that, my friend is your mms. Your mms is not a person, it is a combination of thoughts, emotions, feelings , everything you think is YOU. Its your self created image. Now, Who watched the thought....? Now THERE is a thought. Maybe mms does not have to rule your life.
Maybe you can be Free....

Red pill or Blue pill, the choice is yours.

So full of it!

We're all so full of ourselves, we're bursting at the seams. We think about ourselves all the time, we worry about ourselves all the time, we write meaningless unbelievably sissy poems about ourselves and our feelings and our lovers who we have never met in this life and hope to meet when the next turn comes around (when i say 'we', i mean 'you' ofcourse. I'm just too polite to be rude). When will mankind be rid of sissiness? I believe sissiness is a result of overly thinking about oneself and about the way 'I am'.
'I am like that, Accept me as i am'.
A distorted image of oneself, either in a good way or a bad way (like Sawyer in 'Lost') is the core reason for mankind to move away from their true nature.
I just cant believe how full of it we are! (Is the sentence right?)Is it the primordial fear of annihilation that keeps us doing and thinking what we do? I don't just mean annihilation of the body, more so of the 'ego', the small mind, the devil inside us which always wants to be right, no matter what.
The first step towards realizing yourself is understanding you are like a speck of dust caught by the early morning sun peeping through the shades into your bedroom(or any other room for that matter). 100 years from now you will be DEAD and no soul will remember you ever walked the planet. Thats how insignificant you are ( Please note we are speaking about you and not me. )
Going slightly off the track,another question that has been hounding me for some days now, how does my mind know that it has to be confined to this body? hmmm... The mystery deepens....

Sri Sri

"Of all the truths in the world, Divine love alone is the supreme. Because anything else you do, be it a righteous action, if it has no love behind it, that action is worthless. Suppose you have knowledge and the knowledge does not create love and totality of awareness in you, that knowledge is useless! How can you even have the knowledge if there is no love? If you love astronomy then you will go more deep into it. Of the eternal truth, only love stands, and it is the most important. And what is Love? Love is not just an emotion ! Oh, I love you so much. That's not love. Love is seeing that there is no difference. I am you, you are me. You are part of me, I am part of you. Feeling that oneness is love. And it's not just an intellectual understanding, but coming in the level of experience and living that."

"Living life as joy and ease is spirituality. Spirituality is not some ritual, or doing something. It's a very pleasant, uplifted state of your being and seeing that the whole world is all spirit or consciousness. Seeing that there is one Big Mind among all the human beings, animals and all the life in the world is spirituality, and that Love is the essence of Life."

- H.H Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

Golmaal

Yesterday night a theory of mine about Indian movies was proved wrong by an old man in an old movie. I have always believed that no actor from the hindi (or for that matter tamil, telegu or kannada) movie industry was a match for the malayalam actors in portraying comedy. Paresh Rawal is a name which comes to mind when we think of hindi comedy. But he is made to look outstanding because of the mediocrity surrounding him. If i was acting with Sunil, sorry Suniel Shetty, John Abraham or Akshay Kumar, I'd look good too. Not to undermine Paresh Rawal's caliber but if you compare him with stalwarts like Jagathy Sreekumar or Innocent or Cochin Haneefa, he pales in comparison. He would fade into oblivion if he was a comedian in the malayalam industry ( im not talking about new brand of mallu actors like Jayasuriya or Kunjacko Boban).
And then i saw a movie called Golmaal. I think i now know where Priyadarsan and other directors got their inspiration to make the genre of movies which were such hits in Kerala in the mid 80s. The movies with mistaken identities, goof ups and a comic ending where everyone seems to be chasing everyone else. For the first time i saw a hindi actor doing comedy which would have made Mohanlal, Sreenivasan or Jagathy proud. Utpal Dutt was simply AMAZING in the movie and the chemistry between him and Amol Palekar was outstanding. Im guessing the role he played in Golmaal as the eccentric , hard nosed businessman was the one copied by Thilakan and others in scores of mallu movies. The subtle nuances and slap stick comedy in the film are very much like those we see in the Mohanlal, Sreenivasan and Jagathy movies of the 80s.
Blore boyz, a must see for you guys.
Moving on to more tragic movie experiences i had,
Saw 1/4 th of 'Thuruppu Gulan', 3/4 th of 'Chandrolsavam' and the whole of 'Lion'. These movies have the mega stars of malayalam movie industry. Maybe thats why it was a mega pain to even attempt to see these movies. Pathetic.
And on that bright note, i end my musings for the day. toodle doo.

Movies - 21-05-06

Anger Management - **1/2 ( corny ending )
About a Boy - ***1/2 ( Hugh Grant is suprisingly good. Movie avoids most cliches. A good watch)
Shattered Glass - ***1/2 (Based on a true story. Watch it without reading any review)

When it comes down to it

I'd rather be with people i love than anywhere else in the world.
I always thought that. That's exactly why i didn't want to travel.Id give anything in the world for being back with my family and friends. Id give my right hand to see Rachu right now.
Anyways that's life.
Accept it and move on.
I sound as if i were in a disaster movie. Well..nope. Im just in knutsford in the UK. Its a small little place. It has all of 2 streets and one Rolls Royce showroom. And it never stops raining. Its like standing under the shower in Madhu Chettan's place. It isn't strong enough to drench you, but if you stand under it long enough the water will reach all parts of your body.
I've said more Thank Yous after landing in the UK than i have in the last 26 years of my life. Its like they're absolutely infatuated with the word "Thank You". The guy who serves your dinner at the hotel says "Thank You" when he you enter the hotel, order food, drink water ,eat dinner, cough or pick your nose. Since he says it, i feel compelled to say the same when he picks his nose.
Im listening to Radio Dum Dum now. That's a malayalam radio station. Never listened to it while i was in India :-)
Anyways off for now. My wifey should be here soon. Really looking forward to see her here.
Well pip pip.